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  • aomiarmster 12:17 PM on 11/06/2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: punish, side glance, wtf   

    I feel that I am a magnet for side-glances that dripping of venom – keen dislike for me. It would not bother me save for the need to seize them by the face and punish them.

    I don’t want such feelings.

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  • aomiarmster 2:31 PM on 09/06/2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , wtf   

    Forgive me, i thought these were the type you drag off to the side and shit – until my friend screamed at me to just screenshot.

    So obviously first in the throng was Loki… but screenshot picked Thor.

    I AM NOT COMPLAINING. as the screen cap also got the I REGRET NOTHING meme.

    hhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnng

     
  • aomiarmster 1:46 PM on 09/06/2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: damn you brother, , Loki'd, , wtf   

    I let my inner (this is a rarity) fangirl get the best of me and I got Loki’d. 

    My wonderful brother has been living under a rock ( understandable) he works very hard and works and works – and works. So between work and family – he’s mostly working.  AND THUS he had no bloody idea what the whole Thor / The Avengers  is and the following shenanigans.

    As we are siblings I told him that he was Loki and that I was Thor. Given the characteristics of the two, it pretty much made sense.  I am a hot headed ( i dont think before i act pretty much ) and he is the cold calculating type (always advising me to see reason).

    First he looks at me like I killed his cat.

    Then he thinks for a moment and gets angry with me, wondering what kind of nonsense I was bothering him with this time. He is familiar with the Norse Mythology and he gets angry with me for being wrong about it – so I had to explain I was only talking about the Marvel Thor and Loki.

    He side glanced at me and I hesitate – I wonder if it is a good idea to keep hassling with him – I mean WHAT IS THE BIG FUCKING DEAL , then he asks me HOW we were similar to these respective characters. Some aspects did not fit of course, he is my older brother and I am the runt of the group.

    I was explaining how I was like Thor and he nodded and then it came to HIS COMPARISON.

    He has black hair and blue-green eyes, Loki’s got black hair and blue-green eyes.

    He’s a pale lithe thing, Loki’s a pale lithe thing.

    He’s good with words and has a sinister mind-musher of talents, Loki’s good with words and has a sinister mind-musher of talents. I explain the Marvel universe – the movies – and he just simply nods. (can’t say much of the personal details – lets just say there are painful similarities )

    And when I brought up mythos Loki ‘s twins, my brother’s eyes( he always beams with pride when his children are brought up)  lit up for a moment and then he glared at me.

    I normally can’t take him seriously but I got this slight feeling that I had seriously offended him. So he repeats what I had said to just make things clear, he slicked his hair back and I jolted back out of my seat.

    He shouts at me that it was rude to compare him to a “DERANGED-HORNY- TYRANNICAL ASSHOLE” I swallow my pride here, I am convinced I had hurt him with this. I was able to visualize him bursting through the monitor to strangle me.

    So I get all tremble and apologize and greatly try to explain that I did not mean any bad things and he just keeps his icy as fuck death glare at me and he kills our video chat.

    So I sit there completely freaked and confused. I go through several hours feeling simply HORRIBLE and then he calls and he’s laughing his head off saying that if Loki’s mischief tendencies were true – then I would be right.

    😐

    😐

    i spent 10 hours thinking i had deeply hurt him for some ridiculous reason and HE FUCKING TRICKED ME.

    he took the piss and i fell for it.

    i never had such an urge to bonk him with a hammer.

     
  • aomiarmster 9:10 PM on 08/06/2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , wtf   

    Apparently I’m the only mad fucker out here that can burn themselves with ice. 

    fuck me.

     
  • aomiarmster 12:04 PM on 07/06/2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , wtf   

    Aomi’s nudity opens Pandora’s Box. 

    i bring this up  i do not know what is what – yet. I have not even set up a proper background for this demon.

    a good portion of events were not even my idea – but they were the ideas from other people that had either suggested or made up scenarios and felt the need to horrify me with them. i have kept ALL of these but i have not applied them.

    ————-

    the main issue had been as to why Aomi would waltz about in the nude.

    I LIKE the idea of a character enjoying their own body – has this something to do with me personally? NO. 

    Ever since I realized certain people were / are easily frightened by nudity – I put that into Aomi’s character. I even made sure Aomi was never vulgar about it either.

    AND THIS WAS BACK in 1997.

    There is a huge difference between cannon Aomi and Aomi adventures implied by other people. and it was a huge mistake of mine to never have clarified the differences.  it was long ago too but now I have to answer for it.

    this was when the pandora’s box opened. events, people, ideas, thoughts that were not mine – not in my control BUT FROM OTHER PEOPLE.

    I made the mistake ONCE to try and apply one of these events into my artwork – to say the least it made me upset, it made others upset and HENCEFORTH that image and that scenario was wiped away. it could not ever be applied it could not happen – but it did.

    and the damage was already done. I had inadvertently thrown Aomi to the scumbags.

    I never wanted to trivialize the subject matter – most of us realized this but still that horrid dark cloud remains. I understood that I was the master of all things regarding my creations and work.

    Again – in some situations, i had no say for the ideas (they were NOT my ideas)  that were thrown at me. All I could do was apply or not apply. MORE OFTEN THAN NOT I never applied. it would’ve been soul destroying to do so.

    I did not design Aomi to be my punching bag or any other persons’ punching bag.

    Aomi is not a punching bag and Aomi is not a sexual tension reliever.

    What had caused this chaotic situation now? Simple, it is very simple. SIMPLE NUDITY.

    It started because of nudity. 

    That was when I was asked by several people what the reason for the nudity was.  In short – I was lazy and didn’t want to draw clothes – as far as character trait goes, Aomi likes being naked and hanging out in bodies of water. 

    BECAUSE OF THAT – so then they drop that bomb on me. that one bomb I did not think of – did not want to think of – that bomb I did not want to even include with this character.

    I was asked if Aomi had been sexually abused / is being sexually abused. They asked if I HAD applied such events onto Aomi. NO. NO. NO.

    This froze me, this hurt me.  Where were they getting this from?

    Ah, Aomi’s supposed promiscuity came into the picture.

    Is canon Aomi promiscuous ? I never brought it up.

    Sure, Aomi enjoys flirting, being touchy-feely, being nude and showing off mildly – but actually engage in rampant sexual encounters? I never confirmed or denied this.

    So what if Aomi would enjoy sex? So what if Aomi didn’t?

    If I were to deny a request – Aomi would be deemed a slut, a whore, and other vile adjectives.  OH! OH AOMI SAID NO TO ME, AOMI IS A FUCKING WHORE! Suddenly my existence as the creator did not matter to these people.

    My entire stance in the issue was only that Aomi enjoyed her/his own body and liked being nude- the whole factor was to make others uncomfortable with simple nudity.

    Whether Aomi enjoyed having sex or sought out sex – I never brought it up.

    So if Aomi is comfortable with his/her body and enjoys sex does not mean that that stems from abuse.   They even suggested that the nudity would cause sexual abuse. The whole horror of “THEY ASKED FOR IT”

    If I glance at the statistics about sexual abuse, yeah, I can see how it might apply but NOT in every case. NO ONE ASKS FOR IT. No one asks to be raped. No one asks to be abused.

    I can understand where they were coming from, asking me that question.  I did not want to use sexual abuse as the catalyst to explain Aomi’s  discomfort or comfort of her/his sexuality. I did not use it. No, no. and no.

    OTHERS have.  I can’t control what other people feel or think – specially with little information they have. For the most part, with whatever I had put out there, I left it that way so that people could draw their own conclusions.

    I wish that from the start I had clarified what was canon. What I WANTED for Aomi.

    For the most part, I feel horrible, I should’ve clarified everything from the start so that the “Aomi does not have sex Aomi gets assaulted” and the “Aomi was assaulted so Aomi has sex” did not have to apply. IT NEVER DID.

    I don’t like where they went with this – they basically said I was trivializing a very serious issue.  What trivializing? How? I never even made a scenario to include such a thing! IT NEVER EVER CROSSED MY MIND.

    When it all started it was simply about making people uncomfortable about nudity- THAT’S IT. There was no sex involved. Period.

    so people brought sex up, i didn’t have a problem with that – then it got very scary – i had to stop it.  it was out of the question then.

    As I said, I had/have no control over what people think and feel. They came up with their own conclusions. I can correct them of course.

    How did it go from Aomi enjoying her/his nudity because HE/SHE JUST DOES -to Aomi flaunts her/himself because she/he was a victim of sexual abuse or that because of flaunting Aomi gets sexually abused?

    So if Aomi had been abused and in order to deal with that horror he/she would fall into a spiral of self destruction by flaunting her/his body and engaging in rampant sexual encounters?

    So if Aomi just enjoys relaxing in her/his own skin means Aomi is asking to be assaulted? What?

    Seriously. What? THAT is what they told me, that was their reasoning to come out of the wood work and hassle me.

    I was trying to explain that there was no shame( as in there being WILLING – CONSENTING ADULTS)  in enjoying sex ( i did not get that far) and that nudity was not a crime.

    OH, BY ALL MEANS, I’M A REAL FUCKING MONSTER.

     
  • aomiarmster 11:51 PM on 06/06/2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , arousal, , , , , , wtf   

    Aomi doesn’t invoke madness, just mild gayboners.

     
  • aomiarmster 10:12 PM on 05/06/2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , wtf   

    Yeah… lets keep the hostilities against shapeshifters a bit civil please… 

    getting tired of of harassment and sexual violence .

    😐

    seriously.

     
  • aomiarmster 4:32 PM on 05/06/2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , mum, , wtf   

    So my mum made Loki’s helmet out of foil then put it on my head and pinched my cheek saying “my precious trickster”. I FROZE 

    DAMNIT MOTHER,WHY DID YOU LOKI ME?

    …i am Thor…

    srsly.

    —-

    i realize… mum is good at head games.

    is my mother Loki?

    NNNNNNNNNNERHGHGGHGNN

     
  • aomiarmster 8:26 PM on 04/06/2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , wtf   

    You know things are pretty fucked up when you are afraid to admit that you are female when asked what sex you are. 

    I always answer that I’m a robot.

     
  • aomiarmster 1:35 PM on 01/06/2012 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , july, sub, , wtf   

    So I can not play TERA online until July. 

    waaah i’m going to miss my Elin 😦

    Looks like no Golden Dragon skins for Aomi..

    I did buy the game and the sub for MAY but not for JUNE.

    Oh well I’ll be back in July.

     
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